Welcome to a way out, Walkman-melting, battery-sucking hit parade of teen comedy soundtrack cuts assembled by Mike “McBeardo” McPadden, author of TEEN MOVIE HELL: A Crucible of Coming-of-Age Comedies from Animal House to Zapped! This is your Teen Movie Hell mixtape, crank it for use extremely unwisely!

Track #10. MISSING PERSONS, “Mental Hopscotch” from Lunch Wagon (1981)

The power couple at the neon heart of art-gassed future-pop freak parade Missing Persons were Dale and Terry Bozzio, veterans of the Frank Zappa war machine who designed several of the most enduring new wave concoctions of the early MTV era with “Words” and “Destination Unknown.”

Between the release of their debut four-song EP in 1980 and their debut breakthrough Spring Session M in 1982, the deceptively brainy band let their rip-roaring song “Mental Hopscotch” off its leash to serve as the de facto theme song of slapstick T&A romp Lunch Wagon.

In fact, Missing Persons didn’t just dispatch a lackey with a record in its teeth, they journeyed into Teen Movie Hell themselves and actually perform the song in Lunch Wagon in character as a band called Teddy and the Rough Riders. When the credits roll, their songs are credited to “U.S. Drag.” In this case and this case only, we accept all substitutes.

Are you feeling the summer heat yet? When you’re walking in L.A., be sure blast the Teen Music Hell playlist and keep your sunblocked nose in the book TEEN MOVIE HELL:

TEEN MOVIE HELL: A Crucible of Coming-of-Age Comedies from Animal House to Zapped!, by Mike “McBeardo” McPadden




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